Give Your Happiness Baseline a Boost
Every human has a baseline standard of happy, but how do we move that baseline up to be even more happy? (Hint: It involves smiling!)
When I wrote my book, How To Design A Life Worth Smiling About, I dove deep into the science and psychology of happiness. One of the fascinating things I discovered is this: We all have what researchers call a Happiness Baseline.
That means no matter what happens—good or bad—we tend to return to our own internal “normal.” Think about it: someone wins the lottery? Sky-high joy—for a while. But studies show that after the thrill fades (and the money’s often gone), they usually return to the emotional state they had before the win. The same goes for setbacks and sadness. Over time, we level out.
So here’s the real question:
How do we raise that baseline?
How do we build a life that feels better, even when nothing big is happening?
That’s the kind of question that changes everything.
The Smile Strategy
There’s a quote by Sivananda Saraswati that nails it:
“Make others truly happy as you strive to make yourself happy. Speak a helpful word. Give a cheering smile. Do a kind act… You will feel great joy.”
Translation? Joy isn’t just found. It’s given.
When you bring a smile to someone else’s face, something powerful happens—you raise their baseline, and your own in the process.
That’s why this week, I want to challenge you to start giving out Smile Moments like they’re gift cards. Or—if you’re feeling festive—like they’re holiday cards. A small gesture. A kind word. A little help. These are the things that shape not only someone else’s day—but your own.
The Clay Analogy
Here’s one of my favorite ways to explain this:
Imagine a lump of pristine white clay. Now add a few drops of red dye—anger, resentment, negativity. As you knead the clay, the color spreads. No amount of working it will make it white again. But—add more white clay? The color begins to dilute.
That’s what a Smile Moment does.
Anger is the red dye. Kindness is the white clay. Every positive act you put into the world helps dilute the negativity that’s out there. It might not change the world overnight—but it’s a start. And it starts with you.
A Real-Life Moment
Not long ago, I ordered a glass cabinet. When the FedEx driver dropped it off, I watched on my porch camera as he threw it—shattering the contents inside. Naturally, I reported it. When he came back the next day, I calmly let him know I’d filed a claim—and he responded by swearing at me.
That’s not okay. I reported that, too.
Now—Smile Moments aren’t about ignoring bad behavior. Sometimes, standing up and holding someone accountable is the kind thing to do. But it doesn’t mean we stop looking for ways to do good.
Fast forward a few days. A new delivery guy shows up—struggling with a heavy box. No cart. No help. Just him and six more boxes in the truck.
I walked out, said, “Man, I’m sorry. These things are brutal. Need a hand?”
We ended up unloading the truck together with my cart. And when we finished, he said, “I wish more customers were like you. Thank you.”
That moment? It wasn’t about being a hero. It was about being human.
Maybe he’d had a tough day. Maybe someone else had thrown red dye in his clay. But that day, I got to add a little white clay back.
And that is the kind of contribution we can all make.
Your Turn
Go out this week and look for ways to create Smile Moments—on purpose. Give someone a kind word. Lend a hand. Let the car merge. Tip extra. Just do one more good thing than you normally would.
Because every time you lift someone else, you lift yourself, too.
What’s Next?
Want to keep the positive energy flowing? Revisit the Power of SMILE Stops™ for creative, heartfelt ways to connect with your sphere and community—without feeling salesy.
Need a mindset boost? Take five minutes to read this classic: Reprioritization for Real Estate Agents: Navigating a Rapidly Changing Market. It’s all about taking control of your energy and focusing on what (and who) matters most.
Remember: When you lead with service, value, and yes—even a smile—you don’t just grow your business. You grow your impact.
Let’s get out there and make someone’s day. You might just raise your happiness baseline while you’re at it.
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