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Why We Should Talk From Our Hearts, Not Heads
May 6, 2022

Why We Should Talk From Our Hearts, Not Heads

We all mess up. We’re human. It can make us flustered and embarrassed. As hard as it is to face them, know that mistakes don’t have to define you.  

The award-winning actor Michael Fassbender once said, “We feel a lot of pressure about looking silly or appearing weak, whatever that means, or being a failure. You have to keep it in your head, ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’” We’ve all heard people say, “Never show anyone your weakness.” The idea that we must always appear strong or never make any mistakes is deep in our subconscious. It drives us to perfection, which is why making a mistake has become so devastating — we believe we aren’t allowed to make mistakes. I disagree.   

Now, repeat after me: “It’s OK to mess up.” Did you say it out loud? Repeat it again, out loud.  

Messing up makes us relatable to the others around us because they have also messed up, and they understand what it’s like to make a mistake. The biggest thing is to move on past it because the ability to do that and be resilient is where we find growth. But, how do we do that, you ask? Just start talking from your heart.   

TIP: This article by Odyssey dives into “7 Reasons Why It’s OK to Make Mistakes 

My Personal Story 

During this pandemic, we have had my Father-in-Law staying with us. Since he’s immunocompromised, we took that very seriously, and I stopped doing my usual live events and seminars over the last couple of years. 

Recently, I started booking live events again, and I was really excited about getting back up on the stage and being face-to-face with Power Agents® and other agents who were there to listen and learn.  

At my very first live event, I headed out onto the stage, turned to the audience, and promptly froze. I couldn’t think, my voice started to shake, and I could feel this sense of panic growing. I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience, and I started talking to myself, saying, “What the heck is going on? I’ve been doing this for 30 years! I never get this nervous!” I wasn’t even that nervous at my first seminar 30 years ago. Yet, there I was: on the stage, in the spotlight, in front of everyone, and I had no choice but to keep going.   

I could barely remember what I was supposed to do or what to say. Words were coming out of my mouth (though I don’t even remember what I said) but then, about 10 minutes into the seminar, something fascinating happened — I went from being in my head to being in my heart.   

I found my footing, and with it, this incredible sense of peace. I started to talk about something significant to me. It was about the company and my son. I stopped worrying about doing it the right way, how I looked, or how I was being perceived — I stopped “doing” and started “being”. By the way, the rest of the seminar was fantastic. 

TIP: Read our related article, “Being vs Doing

The Takeaways  

The points that I’m trying to make with this story are these: 

  1. It’s OK to mess up, no matter how much time, experience, or training you have. 
  2. When you do mess up, the magic happens when you push through it and just keep going.
  3. You push through by talking from your heart, not your head. 

It is so important to talk from your heart and not your head because when we’re doing what we do to help people, we want to do it the “right” way. However, when we’re focused on doing it the right way, we start to choke up and panic because we are in our heads. The only way to get out of your head is to talk from your heart — your commitment to serving, not selling, coaching, not closing — and give your all because your “all” isn’t in your head; it’s in your heart. When you do this, people will respond accordingly. 

“No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone that isn’t trying.” – Tony Robbins

TIP: Check out this incredible article for real-life inspirational examples from our own Power Agents®: “Real Estate Success Stories 

What’s Next? 

Are you ready to start taking things to the Next Level®? If you don’t already know what you need to do to get to your next level, we can help!   

Power Agents®, for all the tools, resources, and strategies for ensuring you are prepared with skillful answers to any objection your potential client might raise, head to the Power Agent® Magazine tab in the Classroom.  Whether you need a boost of confidence or empowering dialogues, we are here to help you get the skills you need to be the go-to agent for the buyers and sellers in your farm area.  


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Danielle DePalma

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